I’d been through a lot before I finally settled down on my own with my own family now. I had gone through a lot of trials and been with different people whether I like it or not. I worked abroad even I didn’t want to. I did it for the love of my family. Back then for a decade, I was a breadwinner. I was happy with that, knowing that the whole survived with my help and I will continue to help with the best that I can.
I used to regret for not finishing college and blame other people for not letting me passed that stage where I’d see myself march wearing a black toga. But then again, I tried to understand and weigh both the sides and there’s only one explanation that hit me “everything happened for reason”. I may not have graduated from college but I am proud where and whatever I am now. All because of my parents. They made me. They molded me. And I am proud of that. We may have misunderstandings in the past but I know deep in our hearts everything heals in due time.
All these realizations came to my mind the moment I saw Tita Gina lying inside a casket. Sure thing she had a good life, but flaws and frustrations go in that. The life that her children are now facing is the kind of life any parents would not want to happen to their children. I saw from the eyes of my cousins as they stare at her, lifeless, the realization and regrets. If only…. if only they understood each other during the time when she was still strong enough to hear “I love you, mommy”, and back to them “I love you, anak” without any hesitations, maybe it had added a little more extension to her life.
Ahhh! Life is too short. Better say the things you wanted to say now to your lovedones before it’s too late. Now heading to bed and give my girls a hug with bunches of kisses. I don’t wanna end up not waking up the next day seeing my children crying, just because they see me sleeping in a casket without letting them feel how much I loved them.
This working mommy is now signing off for the day…