A few experienced parents who are older than me (who happened to be my friends) advised me “both parents should agree to only one statement when a child is wrong”. Both should say the same thing. Both should be firm with NO when it is a no. But not in our case.
I understand. Deye is a daddy’s girl. And to compliment with that, he tends to be so lenient with her, no matter what. He would always take her side. He tells me that I’m so strict with her. That she’s still a kid to understand things. Don’t scold her. Talk to her. I do. But either way, it doesn’t work at times. Because she knows that Dada is there to take her side. Would you believe that this also happens via Skype?
When she does something wrong, I make her sit in the corner or face the wall. Then I talk to her why Mama had to do that. Believe me! At her age, she wouldn’t look at me as if I don’t exist at all! She would look at the opposite direction and keeps herself busy in any way. She won’t even cry so fast. She would roll her eyes as she waits for the next dialogue I am going to give her. I also isolate her from watching TV and playing with her gadgets when it’s really too much.
My husband scolds her too but that only happens once in a blue moon. And it wouldn’t even last a minute. He says that he tries to avoid it as he sees the girls once a year.
Of course, as a mother, I feel guilty too after every scolding. But I try not to be transparent. I also feel sorry whenever I raise my voice on her. I hardly spend time with her ‘coz I have to be at work all day long. And I don’t want to spend that little time scolding her.
All I want is for her to know the difference between right and wrong, now. Not later when there is no more room for Mama to straighten things up. Soon, the same will be applied to Ishi….
can only imagine lola…ako, honestly, di ko kaya 2 boys ko. sa daddy lang nila sila takot and sumusunod. pag ako ang nagagalit eh deadma lang, ako pa inaaway, kalokang mga bata!
Minsan nga nakakaiyak na lang eh. Pag sobrang tigas ng ulo tas nangangatwiran pa, goodness!
It’s true that both parents SHOULD be equal on punishments and things like that, but it’s also true that it doesn’t always happen this way!! I think you’re doing okay, though, it’s not an exact thing anyway. 😉
~Kayla
may hawig ang ugali ng mga panganay natin, Mitch. yun bang pandidilatan ka pa ng mata, at kung mangatwiran, hay grabe. literally, ilang beses na ako naiyak. feeling ko nga malapit na akong ipatawag ng teacher or guidance counselor ni Thea, ang likot daw sa klase nakaka-distract na, tapos hindi natatapos ang activities.
sabi nga nila, iba na raw ang generation ngayon, halos may similarities kasi ang ugali ng mga bata ngayon.