When You Just Couldn’t Do Anything But…. Hope

Have you ever felt helpless? Have you ever felt there was nothing you could do about something but cry?

Of course. Many times.

And it happens when you least expect it.

October 1996. The time when I thought my life would be futureless. I didn’t see it coming. I thought we were financially okay. I was already in my 4th year – BS Industrial Engineering when my grandfather approached me “I’m afraid you need to stop“. I was helpless. I couldn’t do anything. I just cried till I got tired. Yes. It was my grandfather who said that. My father didn’t have the courage to tell me. He knew from the start how much I’ve wanted a degree. When I told my father it’s okay (though it wasn’t), he consoled me by saying “just this semester“. I didn’t rely on that. Instead, I started looking for a job. That’s the best thing I could do. Help. To ease the financial burden.

God blessed me! A stranger trusted me. I got employed. I worked for the first time – for the whole family. As I’ve said, I didn’t see it coming. My father was already jobless. He’s home for good. Meaning there’ll be no other source of income. When I came to know about the “real” situation, I was determined. I’ll do my duty. I’m their first born. The eldest. I had to do it. For them. All of them.

I worked hard. Sacrificed a lot. Sold my jewelries. Survived within our means. But for how long? I didn’t have the answer at that time. All I could do was cry. And hope. And pray. That someday I’ll get my reward. If not, I’ll just accept the fact that I was destined for this.

My father was sick. He suffers from arthritis. During that time, it just made me more helpless. I was only earning Php4k a month. I had to pay the bills. Send my brother to school. Fill the fridge and our stomach. Comfort my mom. We all had to survive. Through me. I didn’t give up. I found myself one day hunting for an extra income. Avon and Triumph were there to lend me their helping hands.. While I worked in the office, I sold these products to my colleagues, as much as I could. Helped me in some ways. But they were not enough.

An opportunity to work in Makati gave me more hopes. The stranger who first believed in me played my savior again – for the second time. I owe him a lot. If not for him, I won’t be here. He didn’t stop me from grabbing a better opportunity somewhere else. Instead, he wished me good luck!

From then on, everything got better. I realized that we could also do something whenever “helpless” comes to us. You could hope. There’s nothing wrong in that. But remember hope is best matched with hard work (not with James Yap hahaha!).

Try it and everything will get better….